


Cruel to be Kind

by DrgRcnGrl



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Autobots - Freeform, Boring, Completely AUish, Decepticons - Freeform, Does not follow canon episodes, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, She has so many questions, Transformers - Freeform, questions and answers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:55:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23365048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrgRcnGrl/pseuds/DrgRcnGrl
Summary: While William Fowler was the only official government agent to act directly with the Autobots of Team Prime, there were many humans that worked in the background. Whitney Turner, Fowler's goddaughter, was blissfully unaware of the war between the two alien factions. Until now, of course.
Relationships: Smokescreen/OC
Comments: 14
Kudos: 26





	1. Chapter 1

Moving was not something I was used to. My parents had moved maybe once while I was alive, but I was so young that I didn't even remember. I loved my childhood home. Watching it burst into flames was not something I was prepared for. Nobody can be prepared for something like that.

It had been a few weeks since that accident. Everybody told me how I was so lucky that I wasn't home when it happened. I wasn't so sure I believed them. As far as I knew, my parents had been. If they weren't, they were missing. It was hard to wrap my head around.

"Chin up, Whitney," Uncle Will told me gently, gesturing to my plate. "Eat your bacon. I know it's your favorite."

"My favorite is French toast," I laughed weakly, pushing the bacon around with my fork. "And bacon."

Who could say no to bacon? Me, apparently.

He just shook his head. "You're going to start eating more. The last thing we need is for you to starve yourself."

"Have you seen me? Do I look like I starve myself?" If I weren't a different skin color, I'd definitely pass as his daughter. We had that much in common.

That was apparently the wrong thing to say. "Young lady, you need to be more body positive. Positive in general, actually."

"That's really hard for me right now." I thought I was doing great, considering all that had happened. I don't know a lot about trauma, but in my opinion, I was doing the best I could. What else could I do?

We ate in silence for a few minutes. Uncle Will with his cup of dark coffee, me with my creamer and a little tiny bit of coffee. Neither of us wanted to break the silence. It was comforting, but also a little sad. We always had things to talk about before.

Hell, we'd even talk about girl things if it came up. He'd gossip with me about the girls at school, cry with me when I was having boy problems, especially if my mom wasn't around. Nobody knew me better than he did, and I assumed it was the same with him. Besides my parents, he had been the first to hold me after I was born. He was all I had left.

"I have another training retreat," Uncle Will said, finally breaking the silence.

"Oh?" I looked up at him, bacon sticking to my lip. "What for?"

" _Training_. I'll be gone for a few weeks this time," he said slowly. "Too long for you to stay here by yourself."

I dropped my fork, a bit harder than I meant to. "Where am I going to go?" As far as I knew, Uncle Will didn't have many friends. My parents were his best friends. They weren't an option anymore.

He took a deep breath. "I have some friends nearby that will take care of you. That way I won't be worrying about you."

"What?" I smiled. "You have friends? That's a new one."

Uncle Will chuckled, taking a sip of his coffee. Something we didn't have in common, he took his coffee black. I couldn't imagine such a sin. "Unfortunately I do. That way, you won't be alone. I trust them to take good care of you."

If they had Uncle Will's trust, they had mine. It wasn't easy for a man like him to trust anybody. I knew him too well. "What are they like?"

He cleared his throat. "Well, they're a bit different. I think you'll like them. There are five- no, six of them. They have some friends that spend a lot of time at their place as well."

"Wow, must be a big place for six people," I said.

"You could say that."


	2. Chapter 2

Packing to be gone for a few weeks was a lot like packing to move. It wasn't like a vacation where you'd pack three outfits for each day just to have options. Just in case you shit or piss yourself twice daily. In this case, you pack all of your options. All of my routines, packed. All of my leisure activity things, packed. I was sick of all the packing, to be honest, but at least I wouldn't have to pack again for a while. It was becoming far too commonplace.

Uncle Will helped me get my things into the truck and we headed off to his friends' place.

"So are they military? Is that how you know them?" It wouldn't make much sense otherwise. How else was he going to meet people? Believe it or not, Uncle Will wasn't one to go out and socialize on purpose.

"They're on a special branch of military, same as myself and your parents. It's all top-secret and they're... In a program sort of like witness protection," he explained.

"You're not a very good liar," I stated. He normally spoke so self-assuredly. "I'm going to find out either way."

He shook his head. "You'll understand when we get there. I don't know what else to say, Whit."

The drive wasn't as long as I expected. Soon, we drove passed a town that was gone in the blink of an eye. I loved small towns, and this one was no exception. It was cute. One of those towns where you go on a drive because there was nothing else fun to do.

We drove through the desert, and suddenly we were off road. I trusted him to know where he was going, but the bumps didn't help my oncoming headache.

"Hey-hey, we're about to drive into a mountain!" I said suddenly, tightening my seatbelt.

"We're not," he said flatly. Suddenly, a part of the mountain gave way like a sliding door, almost like a garage. A facade.

We drove through this tunnel lined with metal into a huge room filled with-

"Oh. My. _God_." I didn't know my heart could beat this fast. Was this normal? I didn't remember drinking any energy drinks this morning.

It was obviously a huge secret military base, and inside, clear as day, were giant metal robots? Were these the friends that Uncle Will was talking about?

The truck came to a stop, and I hesitated to get out. Uncle Will got out with no hesitation whatsoever, gesturing for me to do the same. The robots turned towards me, expressions that I didn't quite understand. I wished I had gotten my mother's intuition or ability to read expressions. She was almost like a mind reader.

I finally got out, trying not to make it obvious that I was absolutely terrified. Were my arms visibly shaking? Probably. My legs felt like jello.

"Whitney, these are my allies," Uncle Will said. "They will keep you safe while I'm gone."

Big metal robots as my protectors? Seemed legit. "Um," I started. Was my voice shaking too? "What are they?"

"These are the Autobots. Your parents and I were part of a special-ops team to keep them a secret from humanity as they protect us from the Decepticons," he explained. So many big words. "Their enemies."

"Our deepest apologies for your loss, Whitney Turner," the big red and blue robot said, making me jump. They had such booming voices, at least that one did. And so _formal_.

Uncle Will gestured to the big robot. "This is Optimus Prime. He's the leader of the Autobots."

I gave him a little wave. "Nice to meet you, Optimus Prime." He was just so damn big. Even compared to the other ones!

"Over there is Ratchet, their medical officer," Uncle Will continued, pointing to the red and white one. A little quieter, he said, "You'll get along with him. He's much like your father."

I heard Ratchet heave a sigh, turning to give me a nod before turning back to his work. Friendly enough, I guess.

Uncle Will gave introductions to the remaining robot, one named Smokescreen. He seemed energetic, less mature than the other two. He reminded me of an old friend from high school, his attitude anyway. I could at least read him.

"There are three others, but they're out with their human charges," Uncle Will told me. "You'll meet them later. I wish I could stay and help you settle in, but I really have to go."

I gave him the tightest hug I could manage. "Do you have to go?" I whispered. These robots, Autobot things were just so big. I couldn't help but be a little scared, nervous. I had known them for maximum five minutes, and now I was going to live with them for a month? What was this world coming to?

"You'll be just fine," he mumbled. "They'll keep you safe. I would never put you in harms way."

I held back tears as I watched him drive away. I almost didn't even want to move. What if I make one wrong move, say something wrong, and they just decide to step on me? It wouldn't be that hard. I'd be an easy target. I wondered what noise I would make if I was underfoot.

The secret tunnel entry opened and closed, and suddenly I was alone with three robotic beings that could so easily hurt me. Was I supposed to feel safe?

The white one knelt down near me. Smokescreen, was it? "It's going to be alright," he told me quietly. "We're not going to hurt you."

"How am I supposed to know that?" It came off a little harsher than I intended. Whoops.

He laughed a little. "If we did, we'd be in big trouble with Fowler. That's the last thing we need right now."

He wasn't wrong, I'll give him that, but Uncle Will was not the biggest threat in the world. Not compared to them. "What are you guys? Did someone create you? Big government secret weapon?"

The medic-bot gave a snort. Ratchet, did my uncle say? "Please! We are far too complex for humans to have created."

"We are autonomous-robotic organisms from our home planet of Cybertron," the leader told me from afar. "A great war separated our species, and destroyed our home."

"The Deceptripods, right?"

" _Decepticons_ ," Smokescreen corrected me. "After the war reached its peak, all the Cybertronians remaining left. We came here to find refuge and, well, now, we are here to protect your species from the Decepticons."

"This is a lot to take in," I said slowly, picking up one of my bags. "A lot. Did you guys know my parents?"

The largest one shook his head. "No. Our only human government connection is Agent Fowler. As far as I am aware, he reported with them. The less humans in contact with us, the better."

"Didn't he say you have human companions?"

"That was accidental," he replied.

"Very," Ratchet muttered.

"For now, we will not confine you to this base at all times," Optimus Prime told me. "However, because of your safety possibly being at risk while in contact with us, Smokescreen will accompany you on any outings you wish to have."

"Like a bodyguard or like a babysitter?" I asked. I really hoped it wasn't a babysitter-type situation. I was twenty years old.

"I hope to become more like a friend than either of those, personally," Smokescreen told me with a smile. "If that's okay. That's the sort of thing Arcee, Bulkhead, and Bumblebee have with their humans."

"Are they the other ones in your crew?"

"Yes, and they should be back shortly," Optimus told me. "For now, Smokescreen will help you with your things."

It actually worked better than I expected. I had quite a few bags full of stuff. I couldn't carry them all at the same time, so having a robot lend a helping hand to me was quite useful. I don't know why regular humans didn't have robot companions to help them. The lazy humans, anyway. Me.

To my surprise and shock, honestly, Smokescreen's body started to contort into a car.

"What the-"

"Nice, huh?" He revved his engine. "I picked this altmode out myself, with the help of Jack, of course. He's Arcee's charge." He opened his passanger side door. "Here, put your bags in here so you don't have to carry them."

He didn't have to ask me twice. I placed most of my bags into his car form and then stopped suddenly. "Where are we even going? Where am I staying?"

"Don't worry, I'll show ya!"

He drove slowly, probably so I could keep up with my short legs, through a tall hallway. At the end of the hallway was a room. The entrance was huge, probably so the Autobots could go in and out if they wanted, but the room was filled with military bunks, wardrobes, and desks.

"I could sleep in a new bed every night if I wanted to," I voiced to myself out loud. "And still have some to spare."

"I know it's probably not what you're used to- Primus, none of this is," Smokescreen said, his voice coming through the radio.

I began to take my stuff out of him. That was a weird-ass sentence. "At this point? At least I have a place to sleep and to keep my things."

As soon as all of my things were out, he transformed back to his humongous robot-form and sat down on the floor, crossing his legs. "I'm really sorry what happened with your parents. I know what it's like to lose people you care about, if you ever want to talk."

I glanced over at him as I began to put my stuff away in one of the wardrobes. "Do you guys have parents?"

"Some of us have creators, which are kind of the same thing," he replied, scratching his head. "Everybody here knows what it's like to lose someone or someones who you care about. War kind of does that to ya."

I stopped suddenly and turned to him completely. "Has this war been going on here, on Earth, and nobody knows about it?"

Smokescreen sat up straight. "Kind of. Your government doesn't want to worry people."

I smiled. "A person is smart, people are dumb. One of my favorite quotes." Men in Black. Now that I think of it, they might be a real thing.


	3. Chapter 3

It took me a good while to get everything settled in. The bunks looked like they hadn't been used in ages, so I took it upon myself to redress one of the bunks in the corner. It wasn't much, but this was going to be home for the next few weeks. I had to make it feel like it.

As for the other bunks, I managed to push them against the far wall, all side-by-side so if I ever wanted, I could sleep on as many beds as possible. An incredibly large couch, if you will. It wasn't easy, but Smokescreen had left by then so I was left to my own devices.

I pushed one of the wardrobes close to the bed I had claimed, filling it with everything I had. There hadn't been much left after the fire, and most of the clothes I did have were new as of a week ago. I doubted I'd find use for any of the dresses, but you never know. I even managed to arrange one of the desks in a way that satisfied me, setting it up as I liked. Even with everything going on, I was still enrolled in online college courses. My parents wouldn't have been thrilled to know that they held me back from accomplishing my dreams to become a psychologist, a therapist.

"Who are you?"

The female's voice made me almost jump out of my skin. I turned around only to face a Japanese girl. She had a streak of color through her hair, and her style was unmatched. She sure knew what she was doing in life. "Who are you?" I asked her in return.

She jabbed her thumb to her chest. "I'm Miko. Are you the one Fowler always talks about?"

That's definitely what Uncle Will goes by around here. "I'm Whitney, Fowler's goddaughter."

Her face slowly contorted into a smile. "Sweet! It'll be nice having another girl around here!" She walked towards me and grabbed my arm. "Come on, I'll show ya around!"

Miko seemed to be nice enough. She was a bit younger than me, but I usually got along with just about everybody. I was the senior that befriended all the freshmen in high school, I knew what it was like to be fresh meat.

She pulled me along through the base, explaining where everything was. It was huge, but not as complicated of a layout as I had expected. Likely because it was first made for humans, then turned into the Autobot base. It made me wonder if I had ever passed a secret government organization before. They were just disguised so perfectly.

"How did you get introduced to them?" I asked her as the tour ended. I remembered the leader saying that it had been unintentional.

Her face lit up. "I caught Jack talking to this motorcycle one day after school, and then Arcee decided to just bring me along. Raf caught some of the fighting action before I did. Because we saw things we weren't supposed to see, Optimus assigned us all guardians for our protection."

Sounded legit. "I think Optimus said something about Smokescreen being my companion or guardian or something."

"He's a much better option than Ratchet," she snickered. "He gets annoyed with us really fast."

"Who are Jack and Raf? Are they here?" As much as I loved meeting new people, especially with the whirlwind of a day I was having so far. Please note the sarcasm.

"Come on, I'll introduce you!" She sounded thrilled to do so.

As it turned out, all three of the Autobots' charges were young. Raf was only 12, Miko was around 14, and I believe Jack was 16. They seemed nice enough. It wasn't hard to tell that the connections they had to their Autobot guardians. It surprised me the most to know the government was okay having kids around such a classified secret. They weren't even old enough to sign official documents.

"So this is Fowler's daughter," the smaller of the Autobots said.

"Goddaughter, but he calls me his niece, I think," I corrected her. "I've known him my entire life."

"I almost want to feel sorry for you," the biggest, dare I say _thickest_ , one told me. Bulkhead, I believe. Miko's guardian.

I laughed, shaking my head. "He's not that bad. He takes so much pride in what he does, and he wants to do it right. He might seem like a grouch, but he's soft on the inside."

"Aren't all humans soft on the outside?" Bulkhead asked as he turned towards Miko.

"It's an _expression_ , Bulkhead!" she huffed, crossing her arms.

It was actually rather boring there, considering we were in the presence of giant alien robots, not nearly as exciting as I had expected. The three kids settled on the balcony, two of them playing a racing game. I finally gathered up the courage to join them and just watch.

"Is this what you guys do around here?" I asked, crossing my legs on the couch.

Jack didn't take his eyes off of the TV. "Yeah. Sometimes the 'bots go out and scout or handle the Decepticons, but we usually just hang out."

"Living the dream here, I see," I said absently, pulling out my cell phone. It had been a while since I beat my high score on Subway Surfers.

"If you want, we could go for a drive," Smokescreen said, leaning over the balcony with a smile. "I've been dying to just drive around with someone. It gets boring here when nothing exciting is going on."

I put my phone away quickly. "No need to ask me twice." I was always down for a drive, especially one with no destination in mind. It was my favorite pastime back home.

Words couldn't possibly describe how thankful I was for that drive. Fortunately for me, Smokescreen didn't dare speak. My mind was allowed to wander into the depths of... Well, more of my mind. It was pure bliss.

So much was happening all at once. Just weeks ago, my life had been completely different. I was unaware of the alien robots that inhabited Earth, and so blissfully unaware of what was to come of my parents. It was easier for me to believe both of them were gone, rather than try to imagine what was happening if they were missing. They never recovered their bodies, but to be fair they didn't recover much after the fire. My parents both even had trackers embedded in their arms so (apparently) they could be tracked. They was simply gone.

There was no way to know where they were.

It had to have been an hour after the drive began that Smokescreen finally broke the silence. "It's really not so bad at the base. It definitely takes some getting used to, but everybody is like a big family. That's what Miko calls it."

"I could use some more family right about now."

"Just know that I understand what you're going through, more than I'd care to admit." As he spoke, the radio blinked to the beat of his voice. "We all do. This war has done so much for our kind and we've done our best to keep humans out of it."

I laughed a little. "Right. But the four, now five, humans are okay, right?"

"They weren't really a choice, but I have to admit, they bring a little something to the base," he chuckled.

"A little spice to the mix?"

"You could say that." I almost swore he sounded amused.


	4. Chapter 4

When nighttime hit, the base fell silent. The three kids had all gone home with their respective Autobots, and I had escaped into my room to settle down. Silence wasn't something I was exactly used to. My mother had always been a talker, some nights we'd be up for hours talking. I had gotten that from her. My dad was the quiet one, at least in public and with those he didn't know. They were a perfect match.

I had found a more comfortable desk chair stuck in some closet and settled in with my laptop on my thighs. Reception here wasn't the greatest, but it was there, and that was all I really needed.

Those kids were so nonchalant about these Autobots. I couldn't imagine any adults I knew would react the same way. I guess it had to do with kids having greater imaginations than adults. Adults are told not to believe in fantasies or fiction. It felt like fiction. I was at the point in my life where I was on the edge- technically an adult, not old enough to drink, but young enough to believe that there were greater things out there.

"Knock, knock." Words spoken, not a sound.

I lifted my head to find Smokescreen in the doorway. It really was huge. "Yes?"

"Do you mind if I come in?" he asked, looking around the room. "Wow. Like what you done with the place."

I let out a breath, halfway between amused and not. "Just wait until I paint the walls pink. Then you'll really like it." It probably didn't sound as much like a joke as I had intended.

"Then it would really be your style!" the robot laughed, making his way inside. He took a seat on the concrete floor, not too far from where I was sitting. "What are you doing? Working?"

"Just schoolwork," I replied. I turned my laptop towards him so he could see. "I'm working towards becoming a psychologist. It's a lot of work, but it'll be worth it in the end. I hope to be finished by the time I'm twenty-five." It was a lot, but I was sure I could do it. I had the right determination and stubbornness.

Smokescreen started to nodded, then paused and cocked his head. "What is a... 'psychologist'?"

A very common question. "A psychologist is a person who can identify behaviors, observe people, diagnose any mental disorders, that kind of thing. Help people work through their issues that aren't quite visible. A doctor for the brain, in a way. I'll even be able to prescribe medication once I'm done."

Before I knew it, I had gotten lost in my explanation. It just fascinated me more than anything. The kinds of mental disorders, how to help people, what medications could do to help people that just a conversation wouldn't. There was so much left to learn, well over six years' worth, but I loved it. I loved learning as much as I could, why people thought how they did, what made them tick. Helping people in ways people didn't imagine possible.

Smokescreen nodded along the way, asking questions whenever one crossed his mind. It made me wonder how different they were from humans. Did they process things the same way we humans did? Could they simply erase any negative experiences from their minds to cope?

When I finally stopped, I looked at the clock at the bottom of my screen. It read well past midnight. I hadn't gotten as much work done as I'd have liked. "Oh, it's getting late," I said, stifling a yawn. I didn't even realize I was tired.

"Do all you humans do that?"

"Do what?" I asked.

"That thing with your mouth," he replied, pointing to me. "When you're tired."

I laughed softly. "We do it when we're tired, bored, or as a reaction to someone else yawning. It's joked that it's contagious." Autobots probably didn't yawn.

"Miko said that humans have to sleep every single day," Smokescreen said. It was as if that fact baffled him. "For hours! Is that true?"

"Technically, we're built to sleep a couple of hours at a time," I explained slowly. "Six hours here, a few hours awake, a nap, back to doing... Whatever while awake. But people usually just sleep at night for about eight hours." If they were lucky.

"Why at night?" Smokescreen asked. Before I could reply, he continued. "Days here are so short compared to Cybertron. We only recharge every few days."

"Most people work during the day, so they sleep at night so they are ready for work the next day," I said. "But some people sleep during the day if they work at night. Some people, however, have sleep disorders so they can't sleep easily. They have trouble falling asleep, some are even scared to." And with that, I began rambling on about different sleep cycles, why people slept how and when they did.

One of my professors always reiterated that explaining things in layperson's terms could help our own understanding. There were three steps to knowledge. Learning something with assistance, understanding something enough within your own mind, and being able to explain it and help someone else learn it. I found myself utilizing those tools more than I ever thought I would in that moment. I hadn't imagined explaining those things to an alien.

I wondered if my referring to them as 'aliens' in my mind would offend them. That definitely wouldn't be good. I was squishy underfoot, after all.

When my throat finally began to burn from all of the talking (very enthusiastic talking, I might add), I yawned once more. "I should probably be heading to bed."

Smokescreen made it to his feet with a nod. "Right. I'll let you get some recharge-sleep, I mean. Remember, I'm here if you need to talk, okay?" With that, he turned and was gone within seconds.

Funny, that sounded like something I should be saying to people. It was my soon-to-be specialty, after all.

After hooking my laptop up to charge, I grabbed my cell phone and sat down on my bed. I sent a quick goodnight text to Uncle Will, who was probably in a completely different time zone by then. With that, I hooked that up to charge and settled in my new bed. I was thankful that I at least had good company during my stay. Just think positive, Whitney, and that's what you'll find.

I slipped into a dreamless sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, hello there, reader! You're looking ravishing today!

It was almost unsettling how easily I managed to feel at home so quickly in a foreign place. I was unsettled at my being settled in. To be fair, it was only the second 'foreign' place I had found myself settling into, but still. It was something to think about.

It was Saturday, and I had managed to sleep in until the ripe time of eight o'clock. I probably would have slept in longer if not for the girlish figure jumping on my bed.

"Whitney! _Whitney!_ Wake up! It's time to get up!"

"Miko," I grumbled, rolling onto my stomach. It wasn't the most pleasant way to wake up, I'll admit, but it was nice to know she thought of me? "Is the world ending?"

"No, but-"

"Do you want it to?"

It was a joke, a bad attempt at one at the very least. At least it got Miko off of me.

"I tried to keep her at bay," I heard Smokescreen's voice. "I really did. She's kind of slippery."

"What if I sleep naked?" I sat up, shaking my head. "I don't think you'd want to see that." I didn't, in fact, sleep in the nude. I did have a shirt on. Underwear, probably. I couldn't really remember.

"It wouldn't make much of a difference to me," Smokescreen replied with a shrug. "We don't wear clothes, we're naked all of the time."

Miko scrambled back to her feet, snickering to herself. "But if you recharged in your _protoform_ -"

That made Smokescreen visibly cringe. "Right, right. That wouldn't be... Good."

They left me only long enough to put on something less revealing. I chose to put on a bra, really it was a struggle but I knew that the boys would probably be there. Comfortable sweatpants, a shirt. You know, what normal people wear. I wasn't sure I considered myself 'normal people' anymore, but I could try.

Miko finally dragged me back to the main room. I kept my laptop firmly tucked under my arm as I trudged along. I doubted any of them drank coffee, but I'd have to find a way to get some. If you weren't getting paid, it wasn't worth it to be up this early.

I gave a slight nod to the Autobots already situated near the balcony. Ratchet, Optimus, the three guardians, Smokescreen. I hoped I was getting their names right. Would it bother them if I didn't? It's a good thing they're not mind readers.

"Morning, sleepyhead," Jack told me, patting the seat next to him on the faded couch. "Care for some Saturday morning cartoons?"

"I didn't even know those were still a thing," I replied, taking the seat after Miko let go of my other arm. I booted up my laptop, finding that I still had quite a bit of work to do for my course. "Aren't you sixteen?"

"You're never too old to be entertained," he told me with a small smile. As I began working, typing slower than I normally did, he nudged me. "I know it's a lot to take in. I tried to leave when I first found out."

Okay, work could wait. "Really?"

Jack, with a few interruptions from Raf and Miko, began the tale of how they found out about the Autobots. How Arcee had been less than enthusiastic about taking them back to base, how they experienced a 'zombie fight' (Miko's words), how my uncle had gotten hurt and that was the last straw.

"He didn't tell me that," I said once they were done. "And to think I thought he told me everything."

"He probably didn't want to scare you," Jack said nonchalantly. "Especially since he left you here."

Right. He did leave me here. "And I'm guessing his department has no idea you guys are here? They probably wouldn't approve of kids knowing top-secret information."

"Do they know about you being here?" Miko answered, though it was more of a question.

"Right," I replied slowly, trying not to laugh. "It must've taken a lot out of him to leave that part out. He's a rule-follower by nature." That was putting it lightly.

"Are you sure you don't want to play?" Raf asked. He had turned the cartoons off and plugged in some sort of videogame. It looked like a racing game. An ancient one, at that.

I turned my attention back to my laptop with a smile. "No. Besides, real street racing gives you more of a rush." As I began to type, I noticed the base had gone silent. I looked up and around. "What?"

"Street racing is illegal," Optimus Prime said. He sounded so formal all the time. It must be exhausting. "Are you saying you have participated?"

Oh. Well, there's that. "I feel like it's better I don't answer that," I replied quietly, trying to type faster. Come on, Whitney, look productive. I felt all eyes on me. Were theirs called eyes?

Focus, Whit, focus.

"Fowler's niece, a street racer?" That voice was Smokescreen. "I wouldn't have guessed. You didn't even ask me to speed up yesterday on that drive."

"Street racing _is_ illegal," I said slowly. "And it was wrong of me to do it. Very wrong. Nobody ever got hurt, though, I promise."

"I wouldn't have thought a relative of Fowler's to be one to disobey the law." That was Arcee. It definitely wasn't Miko, the only other female. Did the Autobots have genders? Sexes? Perhaps a question for another time.

With a sigh, I saved my work on my laptop and shut it. "Okay, okay. Yes, my uncle knows. Yes, he didn't approve. No, I don't do it anymore. Any more questions?"

Smokescreen must have had one, since he raised his hand. One of the kids must have taught him that. It wasn't likely humans and Autobots shared gestures like that. "I do."

Shocker.

"Since when are you a street racer?"

Since it didn't seem the topic would change unless I obliged, I did. "It's probably not as interesting as you think, but when I had just gotten my license, I decided to buy a car that had turbos. It was an older car, but it ran like a champ. My dad and I used to work on it together, mostly for him to teach me things he didn't think any other man should teach me, but I think he wanted to bond with me as well. Um, I was actually pretty good. Won quite a few races, never got caught by the cops. My parents trusted that I'd be safe, and I was."

"What made you stop?" Miko asked, her eyes wide.

I shrugged. "I wasn't racing, but on my way to work one day it was raining. I didn't realize how slick it was. I was obeying the speed limit, of course, on the highway. Ended up bumper to bumper with a stopped car." To that day, I refused to take full responsibility. Who stops in the middle of the highway? "Anyway, I got out of that without a scratch, praise God, but my car was totaled." To be quite honest, it was still a sore subject. I loved that car.

I shook my head. "Haven't raced since. And haven't gotten another car, matter of fact. It turns out, I didn't really need one."

"You definitely don't need one now," Smokescreen said. I looked over to him, only to see him 'flexing' his arms. Were they arms? Okay, questions later. "With me as your guardian and all."

Laughing, I nodded. "Guess not. It's all for the best. Everything happens for a reason, right?"

Whenever something bad happens, I never forget to look up to the higher powers and thank them for the lesson that is to come. That accident really turned my life around. I no longer strove for that adrenaline rush, and was content to 'going with the flow'. Unlike that car, obviously not following the flow of traffic.

My patience had gotten better, I promise, but I did hold a small grudge.

"Agent Fowler informed us that you are studying human psychology," Optimus Prime said, filling the silence. "What does that entail?"

I looked again to Smokescreen. "Care to explain?" Maybe I'd see if he had listened from the night prior.

To my surprise, he began to explain in great lengths. It was almost word for word what I had explained to him. I had to admit, I was a little proud. He was already on his third step of knowledge.

As I began questioning him on what he had explained, he became baffled in his responses. Well, second step at least. First and a half maybe. Nevertheless, I was proud. He had been paying attention.

"Do you want to be a therapist when you grow up?" Raf asked, only slightly interrupting my conversation with Smokescreen. Not that I minded, of course.

"Yes," I smiled. "I want to help people. So many people are out there that don't realize they need help, and I want to help them work through their struggles. I'll probably specialize in PTSD and behavioral therapy, but I'll know more what my niche is the further along I am with my course." There was no need to rush. Years of education awaited me, it wasn't going anywhere.

When they no longer seemed interested in my life, which took longer than I expected, I was back to my work. I already knew I wanted to get my PhD, and was working on my dissertation well ahead of time. I could write at least most of it, and edit it as I went, I figured.

Before long, I glanced at my laptop's clock and saw it was well past noon. I looked up to find all three kids and their guardians were gone, only Ratchet remained. I didn't even notice them all leave.

Well, my uncle had said him and I would get along. Might as well take a shot in the dark.

"Ratchet?" I called out almost hesitantly.

"Yes?" His reply sounded almost as hesitant.

"Why don't you like humans?"

 _Shit_ , probably not the best opening question. At least it made him turn around.

He 'blinked'. Or, the equivalent. "What do you mean?"

I started to stammer. Great. Words. Make words. "I didn't mean it like that! Um, I just mean you don't seem, um, too particularly-"

"Fond of humans?" Ratchet finished for me, cocking his head. "That is not the case. However, those three act too much like younglings for my liking."

"Younglings- that what you guys call children?"

He nodded. "Indeed. It can be cumbersome at times."

"It's a good thing you didn't deal with me when I was younger." Was it too soon for jokes? Probably. Did I make them anyway?

Anything to ease that tension. You could cut through that with a knife.

He snorted, an odd sound coming from someone made of metal. "You were more difficult to deal with? You are still young, only years older than Jack."

I considered that before answering. "Yes, but would it be fair to say that I've had a few more life experiences than he has?"

"It would," he replied shortly.

"Fowler probably likes to leave that part of his memory out," I said with a small chuckle. "I was worse. Much worse. Though I didn't do anything else illegal besides street racing, it doesn't erase the fact that I had my fair share of outbursts and shortcomings."

It seemed he let out a breath. Vent, maybe? Was I catching on? "Perhaps I spoke too quickly."

"Perhaps," I mocked with a smile, hoping he would understand that joke. "You have to go through stuff to have the tools to grow, you know. I don't doubt you guys have had your own, uh, shortcomings to work through."

Was that a smile I saw? "Perhaps we have."

"How long do you guys live, anyways?"

Another vent. Maybe that was a soft spot, bad topic choice. "Eons. Thousands of years, in human terms. I am the oldest on this base. Optimus follows me in age, then Bulkhead, Arcee, and I'm unclear if Bumblebee or Smokescreen are the youngest."

"By that logic," I started. Maybe it was time to start kissing some ass. May as well be liked around here. "You'd be the wisest, the most 'worldly'."

"I'd like to say so!" Ratchet told me. "However, Optimus has had his fair share of... Shortcomings, though they weren't quite so short. He's seen more battle than I have. It would be fair to say he's the most... 'worldly', as you say."

I smiled at him. "What about the kids? I don't doubt you have them on a list."

"Indeed!" It was almost a laugh. "Jack holds the most maturity. Raf seems to follow that, although there is no mistaking he is still very young. Miko, on the other servo-"

"Hand?"

He seemed to flinch. "Yes. She has the most to learn."

It didn't seem wise to press further than I had. I gave him a short nod, of course I understood what he had said about Miko, and turned back to my work. It was the only thing grounding me at that moment. I didn't know what I'd do without my own teachings sometimes.

"Perhaps, your name is found above Jack's."

I decided to take that as a compliment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thank you for getting this far! I hope you're enjoying Fowler's 'niece' as much as I do. She has much to learn about her new friends, and I hope you're here to see it, as well as how her friendship progresses with Smokescreen. Can't forget about him!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this. Being in quarantine has caused my muse to awake. Apparently I'm not 'essential' enough to keep working. Go figure haha. Each comment, kudos, and even hit keeps me going. Hope you're happy to be on this ride! Much love!


	6. Chapter 6

Before I knew it, I had been at the base of 'Team Prime' for an entire week. It was not what I had expected at all. It seemed, more or less, that the base had a systematic way of doing things. Ratchet hardly ever left, only to 'stretch his legs'. He always left to drive around. So that didn't make much sense. It wasn't like he walked much. Optimus Prime left to go on joy-rides more often than Ratchet, though not by much.

The three kids and their guardians were on a timeline of their own. They often left at night, returning in the morning after the morning school drop off, left as soon as school was out, brought the kids back if they didn't have anything else planned. The cycle continued.

I was prone to habit-making myself. I tried to wake up before nine each morning, made some coffee for breakfast, work on my schoolwork and my dissertation. I usually didn't leave the base for lunch, especially since I didn't hate having a cold Lunchable every day. Smokescreen had managed to convince me to take a break for lunch one or two days, taking me to the only food joint in Jasper. Fast food definitely wasn't my favorite choice of sustenance.

"Don't you ever do anything fun?"

The question startled me. I turned to find Smokescreen looking at me over the balcony. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," he started, scratching the back of his helm," you're always working. You don't play games with Jack or Miko or Raf. You don't really talk to us much other than the usual greetings."

"I don't think Ratchet minds that I'm quiet," I laughed softly. "College is a lot of work, Smokes. And we humans don't live as long as you guys do, we only have a limited amount of time to do it." Of course, I knew there were people that didn't finish college or even start until they were much older than me. I just wanted to get a good head start. I didn't want to be a therapist starting out at seventy years old.

Okay, that was a bit of an exaggeration.

"Didn't you say you were already ahead?" Smokescreen asked, tilting his helm. "Breaks shouldn't slow you down that much. You could go scouting with me if you'd like."

For some reason, I felt like he didn't feel as much of a 'guardian' as the others. To be fair, though, the others were a fine cross between 'babysitters' and 'guardians'. I didn't live off base, so he didn't need to watch over me at night. I didn't make him chauffeur me around. Maybe I could change that. I was pretty far ahead in my courses, after all.

"Sure, why not?" I smiled, closing my laptop. "But only if we stop for ice cream."

He blinked. "Ice cream?"

Oh, he had much to learn.

If there was anything that anyone could bribe me with, _ever_ , it was ice cream. We were lucky the Knock-Out Burgers place had an ice cream machine. How else would I fill those cravings?

"Thank you, Jack," I grinned, taking the cone from his hand. "Making the big bucks here?"

"Oh, I'm living the dream," he told me with a small smile. "You're finally out of the base." It appeared even he noticed my hermit-ness.

I waved the cone. "Only for this. And some scouting, apparently, whatever that entails."

He waved me goodbye as Smokescreen pulled away, turning down a random street. Oh that ice cream was heavenly.

"So," I said between licks. "What does this 'scouting' entail, anyway?"

"Driving around, making sure there aren't any Decepticons around, seeing if there are any energon deposits that we might have missed. Mostly driving around."

It was so weird to speak to a radio instead of a person. I had no eyes to have contact with, but I made do with just looking at the volume dial. Same thing, right? "A good drive sounds good. Hopefully, no Decepticons, right?"

"They've been quiet recently, I think, so I doubt we'll encounter any."

"I hope not. I may be trained in self-defense, but I don't think that would help against any of them," I said. "Miko says they're huge. Even bigger than Optimus."

A chuckle came through the speakers. "They may be larger than some of us, but what we lack in size we make up for in spirit."

"You seem full of that." Was there ice cream all over my face? Sure was. It was part of the experience. "I'm sorry I'm not as fun as the others. To 'guard', at least. Miko definitely would have-"

He interrupted me. "No! No, it's not that, Whitney. Really. You don't have to apologize for yourself. I know none of this is what you really wanted, either."

Smokescreen was right about that. I had no idea what my uncle was getting me into. I trusted his judgement, maybe a little too much at times, so I trusted them as well. "It's just easy for me to escape. I don't love to have my thoughts just wandering about, you know?" It was all a grand excuse for a distraction away from... Well, my parents. They wouldn't want me to put my life on hold because of them.

"Sometimes, it's good to do that. Isn't that what you said? You don't move on, you move through."

Curses to my own words. "I know, I know," I muttered. "You have a good memory. Didn't I say that a while ago?"

"You did. Hey, should we see how fast I can really go?"

"Smokescreen, I'm not sure that's _the best idea_!" Not even halfway through my sentence, his speedometer began to climb, reaching one hundred in a fraction of a second. " _Smokescreen_!"

Speed held such a place in my heart. Hell, I almost broke my own speedometer trying to figure out my top speed. That thing only tracked up to one-fifty, but it definitely exceeded those expectations. But this speedometer was digital, and it was exceeding two hundred.

My heart began to pound almost out of my chest. This speed, my head couldn't process it. I could smell the airbags that had deployed only a few years ago. I felt my head begin to warm. "Smokescreen, _stop_!" Could he even _hear_ me?

I shut my eyes as tightly as I could, feeling my body tremble against the seat.

When I finally opened my eyes again, we were at a complete stop. Smokescreen didn't say a word. It was as if all illuminations inside of his alt mode had dimmed.

"I think I'll pass on the scouting," I whispered, closing my eyes again.

It was a deathly silent ride back to the base.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you've probably caught on by now, dear reader, some of Whitney's life experiences parallel my own. Maybe not the street racing (I was a legal drag racer, mind you) but the car accident. It's not something your brain takes lightly to. Smokescreen has a lot to learn about our new human.
> 
> Smokescreen: gotta go fast  
> Human: how about no


	7. Chapter 7

As soon as we made it back to base, I rushed into my room and shut the door. Curse this base for not having doors that locked.

Why didn't he _listen_ to me? Was I not being _loud_ enough? Could he not _hear me_ over his roaring engine? Did he not _care_?

_No, Whitney, that wasn't it- he probably just didn't understand. How could he?_

"God bless America," I muttered to myself, logging into my laptop. If anything could distract me from my own thoughts, it was working on my dissertation.

The clock on my laptop read 5:00pm. It was the last time I allowed myself to look before diving in head first to my work.

_Philosophy relates to psychology in a multitude of ways. In a way, the human mind would not understand psychology without a dull understanding of philosophy itself. Psychology derives from four basic topics, sensation, perception, intelligence, and memory. Understanding each field and using those as tools will each give a different, though not at all incorrect, outcome. Usage of philosophy as opposed to psychology will induce vastly different conclusions..._

When I finally let myself look at the clock, it read 11:04pm. I was another five pages deep into my dissertation, explaining the importance of perception versus intelligence in psychology, when a rather quiet knock came bouncing through my ears.

I turned around on my desk chair. My laptop sat on my lap, as opposed to my desk as it probably should have for posture purposes. "Who is it?"

"It's Smokescreen. I came to apologize."

Of course it was, and of course he did. I couldn't say no, could I? He didn't really ask to come in.

"That it?" was the best reply I could muster at the time.

"Can I come in?"

There we go. We all knew it would come to that. "Sure. Door's unlocked." I'd have to have a word with my uncle about that. A girl needs her privacy sometimes, you know?

The door, though more like a garage door than a regular door, opened slowly to reveal Smokescreen's holoform. He looked... Nervous? He gave me a small wave as he made his way towards me.

"I wanted to apologize for my, uh, behavior earlier," he told me, refusing to look at me in the eyes.

I snapped my fingers at him. "Hey, look at me when you're talking to me." I didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as it did. But basic psychology says that people avoid eye contact when lying. I wanted to know he was being honest.

Smokescreen glanced up, his eyes piercing mine. Could holoforms cry? "I'm sorry for what I did earlier. I should have listened to you- you know, when you told me to slow down. I didn't know it would cause you to..." He shook his head. "I'm really sorry, Whitney. Can you forgive me?"

I opened my mouth to answer, but was quickly interrupted.

"-I mean, I know you probably don't want to- What I did probably doesn't deserve your forgiveness, I was careless and inconsiderate. I'm really sorry!"

He seemed genuine enough.

I nodded. "Alright. I'll forgive you-"

_"-You will?"_

"-On one condition."

His holoform's posture straightened immediately. "Anything! Anything you ask, I'll do it."

"I'll accept your apology," I corrected myself. Forgiveness was for my sake, acceptance was for his. "If you promise to listen to me. When I say stop, you stop. When I say it's okay to go whatever hell-bent speed you feel like, you listen. Fair?"

He nodded furiously. "Yes! Anything you say!"

At that point, I figured it was the right time to teach this Autobot a form of human interaction. "Right then. Come here." I held my arms out in front of me.

His head cocked to one side. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to teach you about a hug." My family, they hugged all the time. Everybody got a hug. Even strangers sometimes. It was kind of weird, I'll admit, but refreshing.

Smokescreen walked towards me, following my lead with his arms out. I learned quickly that his holoform was much, much, taller than me. I was just over five feet tall, this guy had to be at least six. He looked like a zombie with his arms out.

With a small laugh, I wrapped my arms around his holoform. I hadn't noticed before how oddly realistic these holoforms were. They looked human, right to the T. Even more so than digital 'humans' like on The Sims games.

He followed my lead, hugging me a little tighter than I thought he would. My cheek pressed against his chest. It was almost like I could hear a heartbeat. Impossible, but good job on Ratchet. These things were stellar.

After a few seconds, I let go, but Smokescreen didn't seem to get the hint.

"Uh, Smokescreen?"

_"Yeah?"_

"You can let go now."

"Oh! Right," he said quickly, releasing me from his grasp. "Sorry. That was... Nice."

"You're welcome," I grinned, laughing. "I'll teach you to be a good hugger yet!"

His face dropped. "You mean, that wasn't good?"

I shook my head quickly. "No, but there are- it's kind of a science, really, the human hug." I gave him a few small pats on his shoulder. "Nobody gets it right on the first try."

Kind of like-

Nope, we are not going to go there. ~~Not with this alien thang.~~

"I'm a fast learner. I'll make you proud!" Smokescreen smiled at me before glancing at the laptop I had left open on my desk chair. "Working on your paper again?"

I began walking back. "On my dissertation, yeah. It's got about fifteen pages on it right now, I'm hoping to hit at least fifty before I start to hardcore edit on it. Most dissertations have to be at least 21 pages long, but they're usually around a hundred. I figure editing will add a lot. Plus, I'll know more by then."

"How long does it usually take to complete a disser-dissertation?" he asked me, taking a seat on my bed.

"About a year," I replied with a shrug, placing the laptop back on my lap. "But I'm trying to get a head start. I want it to be my proudest creation."

Smokescreen nodded at me before allowing himself to look around my room. He hadn't been in my room much since I had moved in, let alone in his holoform. I had no doubt it looked very different from closer to the ground.

I couldn't begin to imagine what our world looked like from the point of view of a giant mech. We'd be like ants to them. Just as easily squashed, too.

"Would you mind telling me more about it? The dissertation?" he asked finally.

"Do you want me to read it to you?" I said with a small laugh. When he nodded, I scrolled back up to where it began. "Alright, you asked for it."

-

Forty-five minutes later, I pressed 'save' on my document and closed my laptop. I looked up at Smokescreen to find his jaw on the floor.

Figuratively, not literally. Don't be ridiculous.

"You wrote that?" he asked, clearly in awe. "That's- how did you write that?"

I laughed to myself. "Fifteen sources, many years of writing courses- you liked it?"

He nodded fiercely. "It doesn't sound like you at all! It rivals the archives I guarded back on Cybertron, written by our greatest philosophers and writers of our past. You really wrote that?"

I nodded. "Yeah-"

"I mean, it probably needs a little work-" He was getting ahead of himself, of course it needed work-" but it was awesome! I didn't get bored, not once!"

"Props to me, then," I grinned. I hated reading papers that were so formal, so dull. While my paper needed to be formal, such was that of a dissertation, I knew I wanted it to have a little spice. Sly jokes here and there, common references that I doubted Smokescreen understood from his short time on this planet, but at least he enjoyed it. "I haven't actually had anyone look it over since I started it. Maybe once I'm done with the bulk of it, I can have you look it over."

"Or better yet," he said, holding up one finger," have the old doc-bot look it over. He'd definitely be interested in something like that. He'd give you some pro-tips as well, seeing he's in the field of medicine."

"He's more of a... Physical medicine kind of guy, don't you think?" I asked, crossing my legs. "This has a lot to do with one's mental state, deciphering it to the bone."

Smokescreen shrugged. "Even so, doesn't your mental state affect your physical state? Ours does."

He had a point there. "Yeah, you're right. Maybe I'll have him take a look at it once it's mostly done. Can't hurt to get another opinion."

Smokescreen gave me a smile. "Right. Well, I'd better let you recharge. See you tomorrow?"

Smokescreen left me to my own thoughts. Mostly thoughts of "How could Ratchet make such realistic human-lookalikes?" and "How can a non-human thing be so attractive looking like a human?" It wasn't right, wasn't fair. Why can't I be that attractive as a real human?

These holoforms were setting such unrealistic expectations. What a shame for humanity. Aliens did us better than we did ourselves.

With a small smile, and thoughts I should definitely not be having rolling around in my brain, I made my way into bed and shut off my light. Who knew what tomorrow would bring? More gorgeous holoforms?

God, please no. I don't think I could handle myself. I was only human.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smokescreen's holoform: *exists*  
> humans everywhere: *excessive drooling*  
> Smokescreen holo: what? did I say something?


	8. Chapter 8

It was a few days after the Incident. I called it that in my head, mostly for comedic value. My reactions that day were very valid, don't get me wrong, but even I could look back on it and realize how ~~dumb~~ silly it was. It was common PTSD, and I knew I'd have to move through it somehow, but there was no way I'd do it alone. At least now I knew I had people that had my back.

It was Tuesday, the day I allowed myself to step back from my work and just be a human. After sleeping in until almost ten, unheard of for me at this point, I had filled my travel mug of creamer and some coffee and made my way to the main room of the base.

Thank goodness I made myself presentable.

"Don't you guys have school right now?" I asked, carefully climbing up the ladder to the balcony.

"Don't you know what month it is?" Raf asked me in return.

I considered that. "June?"

"Summer break," Jack nodded with a grin.

"So what's the excuse you give your parents now?" I laughed, taking a seat on the couch beside him.

"Well," Jack began, scratching the back of his head. "My mom does know."

"My host parents don't care where I go as long as I don't get arrested," Miko replied with a shrug.

"Mine don't even notice I'm gone," Raf finished.

That was kind of sad. "Huh. Jack, your mom knows?" I asked with a small frown, taking a sip of my coffee. Good Lord, I made good coffee.

"She kind of got the wrath of Arachnid, and we had to spill the beans," he shrugged.

"Arachnid? A spider?" I held back a laugh.

Arcee turned to us. "Almost. A rogue Decepticon femme with no mercy, more like it."

"She kind of looks like a spider!" Miko quips, flipping open her phone. "Here, this is what she looks like."

"That's terrifying," I said, making a face. "How many Decepticons are out there, anyway?"

"Too many," Bulkhead said, shaking his helm.

"But don't worry!" Smokescreen said quickly. "You're safe from them here. That's why Fowler brought you here, right?"

I shrugged. "I guess. It's not like they know what I look like, they wouldn't know how to find me anyway."

"You'd be surprised how much they do know," Jack said. "But of how little they know at the same time."

This was becoming quite a grim subject. "So," I dragged on," what's on the activities list today?"

Ratchet was the one to answer me this time. "Activities list? Puh-lease. This is a war."

Okay, maybe a wrong choice of words. "What's the plan?"

"Arcee and I are going out scouting for an Energon reserve later," Jack told me.

Something told me that they didn't do much unless there were things they had to do. If that made sense.

Who knew my day off would be boring?

"Okay, I'll go next," I said with a small giggle. "Never have I ever actually liked a song by Justin Beiber." All of my fingers stayed up.

Looking out, Miko, Raf, and Jack all lost one finger. It took everything I had not to burst out in laughter. Arcee, Bulkhead, Bumblebee, and Smokescreen just looked lost.

"My turn!" Miko announced after a few moments of silence. "Never have I ever stalked someone I've dated." One of her fingers went down, left with seven now.

Jack and Raf exchanged glances, leaving their remaining fingers up.

I bit my lip. "What classifies as 'stalking'?"

"If you gotta ask, the finger's gotta go!" Miko grinned.

Reluctantly, one of my fingers went down. Eight to go.

"You stalked your ex?"

"You have an ex?"

"Hey, I'm twenty years old," I said. "At my age, we don't even play this with fingers. We play this with shots."

Changing the subject did not help.

"Come on, spill the beans already!" Miko said. "Was he cute?"

"I thought so," I shrugged. "When we were together. Now he just looks... Unappealing."

"How long were you together?"

"Three years. We were engaged, actually, which is a big mistake. I was only nineteen."

"What is 'engaged'?" Arcee asked me.

"It's what you do when you plan on getting married," I replied. "You date for a bit, you get engaged, and then you get married. You plan the wedding during engagement. But those last two things aren't typically good when you're so young. Did you know the human brain doesn't finish developing until your mid to late twenties?"

"Huh," Miko frowned.

"And the brain develops from back to front," I continued with a grin. "Which is why the younger you are, the less good decisions you make. The prefrontal cortex, the last part of your brain to fully develop, controls your behavior, your decision making skills, your-"

"Okay, okay!" Miko said, waving a hand in the air. "It's summer. No more learning." She turned to look at the small crowd of six around her. "Who's next?"

"I'll go," Jack volunteered. "Never have I ever skipped class for any reason."

Everybody (and 'bot) turned to Miko as she put a finger down. She apparently held no shame.

I didn't know why it came as a surprise that I put a finger down as well. We were the only two.

"What?" I asked. "Ever heard of 'senior skip day'?"

"That doesn't count."

"My finger placement still stands." I was definitely not a good influence in that moment.

"I'll go next, I guess," Smokescreen said. "Never have I ever ingested too much High Grade and felt it the next morning."

"High Grade?" I asked Miko, nudging her.

"It's like their alcohol," she replied with a shrug.

All four 'bots lost one finger. Jack and I lost one finger as well, probably the least surprising. Raf was only what, twelve? And Miko didn't seem like the alcohol type. She'd be into much more interesting things when she got older.

No, I won't elaborate on it.

Arcee and Bulkhead's questions came and went, and as another round flew by. Fingers were flying everywhere.

Finally, Arcee and Jack left to go scouting for Energon or whatever they were doing. Bumblebee and Raf went out for a drive. Miko had mentioned something about 'dune-bashing' with Bulkhead before they left as well.

"Looks like it's just you and me, toots," I said to Smokescreen. Looking over my shoulder, I added," And the doc-bot." I wasn't sure where Optimus Prime had gone, but it was probably important. He just gave me that vibe.

"Toots?" Smokescreen repeated. "Strange human terms."

"Oh, they can get worse," I promised. "What should we do now?"

He sat on that question for a while. "We could go for a drive," he replied slowly. "If you're okay with that."

"Only if you let me drive," I said, pointing a finger at him. "No funny business."

"Deal."


	9. Chapter 9

Thankfully, on the jaunt that took place that day, Smokescreen obeyed the speed limit with such marksman-like precision. I guess the Autobots had an internal 'cruise control'. Either that or he was remarkably dedicated to his speed.

"You're allowed to go five over and probably not get pulled over, you know."

"Didn't you say that you wanted to drive?"

"You may be the one actually driving, but who's in the driver's seat?"

He was right, I did say that my terms were that I'd be the driver. I just couldn't bring myself to actually do it. It would feel weird, like controlling a doll. But the doll was alive. I'm no puppet master.

"You fail to realize who makes up the driver's seat."

"Touche," I said with a small smile, rolling down the window just a crack. It was just so nice outside. Who wouldn't want to go for a drive with the windows down? I could even smell freshly cut grass, though I had no idea where that was from. Nevada was a desert. I hadn't seen grass in over a month. "I'm surprised you guys can get out so much. Aren't the Decepticons looking for you guys actively?"

"As far as I know, no," he replied, the radio blinking with each syllable. "They've been quiet for a while, since I got here to Earth actually, now that I think about it. I wish they'd show themselves."

"You want to engage in combat?" I tried not to sound surprised. "Can't you die from that?"

"Offline, yes," he said. "But at least I'd know we're getting somewhere in this war. I'd like to think it's almost over."

I shook my head. "That's the hardest part, I bet. Not knowing how much longer this will last. Ratchet said it's been going on for eons."

"I've never lived during a time where the Autobots and Decepticons weren't at war."

That hit me harder than I'd care to admit. "I can't imagine what that's like," I said truthfully. "Will your planet be rebuilt once this is all over?"

"We'll find a way." His voice was filled with confidence, something he no doubt lacked. "I know we will. Especially with Optimus Prime leading us- we couldn't have a better leader."

"You know, humans don't exactly have history books on the Cybertronian Great War. How did all of this start, anyway?"

That was all it took for Smokescreen to dive into said history of his planet. How it started out as division over politics, the discrepency created when Optimus (Orion Pax, apparently) became a legendary Prime over Megatronus. Megatronus shortening his name to Megatron (but also not really? Two letters, dude). It became clear to me quite quickly how one-sided this history Smokescreen held was.

"No matter how flat you make a pancake, it always has two sides," I mumbled to myself as Smokescreen fell silent.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, both leaders seem awfully passionate about their causes," I said with a shrug. "One perhaps a bit more outwardly than the other. When things didn't go as planned, Megatron started to act out irrationally. But he still believes his cause is the right one."

"I guess you could say that?"

"He just became so enthralled with overcoming the Counsel's decision his own feelings got in the way of what he felt was right. In his own way, he thinks his side is just as correct in their cause as Optimus thinks about his own."

The 'vehicle' almost came to a screeching stop before returning to its original pace.

 _"What?"_ It was as if I had turned the radio volume to full blast.

"Smokescreen, hear me out! Doesn't it make sense? I mean, people aren't just bad people for the hell of it. He wouldn't have made it this far, caused this to go on for so long, if he didn't believe in his own cause. I refuse to believe some people are just bad people, antagonists."

"You aren't suggesting that the Decepticon cause has the same merit as the Autobots, are you?" His voice got deeper with each word. It sent chills down my spine.

"No," I stated. "But I'm saying that they truly believe their cause has more merit than the Autobots."

"I highly disagree," he snapped.

"Who are you to decide what and how they think, hm?"

"I could ask you the same question."

"Perhaps we should change the subject. I don't think I'll get anywhere with you this angry." I crossed my arms, gazing through the windshield at the stretch of road ahead of us. Empty road.

I heard a sigh from the radio's speakers as it lit up once more. "I'm not... Angry, Whitney," he said finally. "Just confused why you'd take the side of the Decepticons."

This time I couldn't hold it. I burst out laughing, trying not to disturb his driving, though I wasn't sure I could at that point. "That's what you took from that conversation we just had? Come on, Smokey, I'm not dense. My future career is psychology, unraveling the troubles of one's past and helping them by giving them the mental tools they need to move forward- I can't do that without understanding why people think the way they do. You can't be a good 'shrink' if you can't relate to every client in one way or another."

"Are you saying you can relate to Megatron?"

"Obviously to an extent," I snorted. "When I haven't gotten my way in the past, I've acted out. I've made rash decisions, said things I meant at the time but regretted in the long run. Megatron seems to take that to an extreme, but it's not like it's unheard of. From what I've heard of you guys talking about him, he's smart and probably a master manipulator."

"You got that right," he agreed quietly. "Optimus is smarter, more collected, but we just don't have the firepower we need to have ended it already."

I've tried so hard, but my career path and my learnings never took a break. Even if I wanted to, it always snuck up on me in one way or another. And here it was, expressed in all of it's glory.

There was no doubt in my mind that I chose my major right. One hundred percent. I lived and breathed it.

"You somehow blame yourself for that."

"What drew you to that conclusion?"

"Hey, I ask the questions," I said with a small smile. "But to answer that, it's about how you talk about it. Whenever you mention how great it's been since you got here on Earth, on Team Prime, there's a sliver of uncertainty in your voice. Maybe you feel like you're not deserving of such a position, or that you're a burden."

"Gee, thanks." His tone was as flat as... Well, something very flat. A two dimensional line. Anything two dimensional.

A conclusion was made. Come on, Whitney, a rebuttal- a solution. _Words_. You need to make _words_.

_Whitney, you are not in the best position to counsel anybody right now. You haven't even graduated. Stop trying to be a therapist._

I'm in too deep now.

"Come on, Smokescreen," I said slowly, trying to hide whatever discomfort and nerves I held. "Miko told me about when you first came to Earth- didn't you help defeat the Decepticons that were part of your welcome party?"

Gotta build him up now, Whitney. You broke him down. You're a contractor now. Build with your words.

"Well, yeah, I guess."

"And hasn't your quick thinking helped tip the scales in the favor of Team Prime, the Autobot cause?"

"I guess it has sometimes," he replied quietly. His voice perked up. "Yeah, you're _right_! I _have_ helped tip the scales."

_Good job, home builder. Now this is a starter home, not a mansion, don't decorate it too-_

Internal dialogue, enough with the metaphors now. We're good here.

"Don't get ahead of yourself there, big guy," I said with a smile, giving the steering wheel a pat. "None of us are perfect. We all need a lot of serious work done, mentally."

"Funny you should say that. I don't think we ever had that kind of medical technology, unless we lost it when the war began. You should tell Ratchet to study it for when this is all over."

"So many warriors are going to need serious help," I agreed quietly. "Ratchet will get it. Hell, he can probably study all the data us humans have online in a matter of days. He'd probably be a better psychologist than me."

"Like you said, none of us are perfect." His voice became gentle. "Humans are fascinating."

"You know, we aren't that different," I said. "Really. Yeah, you're a titan and made of metal, we're small and made of flesh- but really, we're not that different."

"You just said the ways that we are obviously very different."

"True. But you just proved to me that basic human psychology works on you guys as well. You have four basic limbs, well most of you, and a head with eyes and a mouth. You have your basic senses. Your blood, Energon. We are very similar."

"There's one thing I can think of that is very different between our species," he said slowly.

"Oh? Do tell, young one," I laughed quietly.

"You explained 'marriage' earlier, when you mentioned you were once engaged," he began. "It's very different for us."

It was definitely something I meant to ask at some point, romance for alien robots. What human wouldn't want to know that? I didn't need the spicy details, but all life on Earth had more or less the same... Routine. It didn't hurt to be curious.

"Do tell," I repeated, a bit more enthusiastic. I really hoped it didn't come out as creepy as I thought it did.

With the burst of laughter coming out of the radio's speakers, I feared the worst. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours." I had given in, saying that sentence in the most creepy tone I could muster.

More laughter. "Fine! But I don't think I can drive and explain this at the same time. Do you have any destination in mind?"

"I got this," I grinned, grabbing the wheel and pressing on the gas. Knowing I was in full control now, any fear I once had melted away as we climbed numbers on the speedometer. I was determined to find what so many books call a 'desert oasis'. They must exist, right?

After all, if alien robots exist, those surely _must_ be a thing. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah yes, a human and Autobot sharing their own respective 'sex talk'. What could possibly go wrong?
> 
> ;)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared for the sex talk, ladies and gents. It is a healthy, normal discussion.

After driving along the vacant roads for longer than I cared to admit, I spotted a grouping of trees in the distance. That must be what I'm looking for, right?

"You okay with off-roading, toots?" I asked with a small smile.

"Uh, sure?"

With his confirmation in mind, I ripped the wheel to the right, bracing myself for less than sturdy terrain.

Once we got settled in this 'desert oasis' -it wasn't as magical as I imagined, but it would do- I got out and immediately took my shoes off. If you're going to give the sex talk, you have to do it barefoot and outside. Isn't that the rule?

"Who first?" I said, trying to suppress a laugh. Never in a million years did I think this conversation would take place.

Smokescreen apparently decided that this location was secluded enough for him to transform, taking a seat on the sand near me. "I guess I can."

"Shoot, then," I said with a smile. I was much too interested in alien sex and relationships than I'd ever admit to anybody. "It's not classified, right?"

"Well, no, not for us," he said slowly. "I don't think the others back at base will know as much as you do by the end of today."

I grinned. "Information is power, my friend. Do tell."

"Okay," he began. It sounded like he cleared his throat, but I knew that was impossible. "Well, I'll just start with the basics. It doesn't always have to take two mechs or a mech and a femme to make a sparkling. A sparkling is what you'd call a 'baby', I think."

Never did I wish I had my notepad more than right then. I wanted to write questions for the end of this lecture. Lord knew I'd have a ton of them.

"You can make a sparkling with two mecha, but it doesn't have to be that way," he repeated, looking up towards the sky. "Some mechs and femmes are sparked through Vector Sigma. It's a sort of... Life source on our planet. Through there, though, they don't go through the stages of growth like other sparked mechas might. They're placed directly into a frame of an adult one of us."

"How does a sparkling get sparked with two mecha?" I didn't even think to ask how two mechs could spark a being. They were so much more progressive than us mere humans. Wouldn't that be cool?

"Some 'bots are able to interface with one another, but it's not in the way that you think," he explained. "And it can be different for each mecha. Some have interface wiring that they can connect, some have their primaries in their helms. You hook up your interface wiring and you send... Uh, different coding to each other. Some will touch helms and it's more intimate. The sure fire way to get sparked, though, is bonding."

"Bonding?"

"So, bonding is similar to what you humans call 'marriage', but there's no such thing as divorce," Smokescreen told me. "Once you are spark bonded with another, it's for life and death. Very few mecha survive much longer after their sparkmate has offlined."

That sounded awful.

"But you can merge sparks without fully bonding, and that can result in a sparkling," he shrugged. "It grows in one's spark chamber until it's big enough to move to a frame of its own. Because of the war, we've all had coding installed to prevent becoming sparked because we don't have the materials needed for a sparkling frame. Besides, this wouldn't be the best time to raise a sparkling."

"Can all mechs get sparked?" I asked slowly. Was that an offensive question?

"If you were built with a carrier frame, then yes," he nodded. "There are some modifications you can make if you really want to, or if both your partner and yourself can't carry, but we make it work. Oh! Femmes can also spark femmes, though I think that's less common, since we, uh..." He paused, looking down on me. "You've probably noticed the lack of femmes on both sides, right?"

"What the hell happened to all of the femmes?" I asked.

Smokescreen shrugged once more. "Mechs are more likely to spark a mech than a femme, so over time, even with the femmes and mechs bonding, it's just... It's just a thing, I guess."

Oh, it's just a thing.

"What does bonding feel like?" I asked after a while.

His face lit up. "I've never bonded, obviously, but it's supposed to be the most amazing feeling in the universe. You can feel them in you, in your processors. I've heard you can even communicate through the bond. From what I've heard, we used to hold bonding ceremonies, but not so much since the war. It's probably for the better. I think bonding should be a rather private event."

All this- man, my sex education session was going to be so boring compared to this.

"Humans are a lot simpler," I said with a frown. Bonding sounded awesome. But also awful. "Marriage is between two people, any gender in most countries. Some countries, you get killed for being gay, but I digress. It can be religious, or just for tax benefits. It's usually for love, but sometimes it's not."

Humans, we really are horrible as a race.

"But like you guys, we definitely don't need to be married to have sex," I grinned. "It's usually frowned upon, but we do it. A lot. Sex is kind of like what you call 'interfacing', but it's more... Well, direct. See, humans have..."

As I began to explain the differences between a man and a woman's lovely parts, I could see Smokescreen's face begin to lose color. He was even more confused when I explained the idea of people who were transgender, and were born with the wrong body parts. I didn't even think to explain non-binary or genderfluid people. That was not good to bring up on the first class session.

"So they do it that 'normal' way, but some ungodly heathens like to put it in the back end," I explained, trying to keep from laughing. "Which definitely does not lead to a baby, but if that fluid even comes close to the woman's - you know - there's definitely a chance, especially if those swimmers are determined."

Smokescreen, for the first time in his life, was speechless.

"But we definitely do it for pleasure more than procreation, it feels damn good," I laughed. "And you can even do it yourself!"

"Okay, I think we should stop," Smokescreen finally said. He almost looked grey. "That's enough on human biology. I knew you guys were fleshy, but I didn't know how... How..." He just shook his helm.

"Don't even get me started on different animals on this planet," I snickered. "They can get even weirder than us. Some of us keep dogs as pets, and some of those dogs like to hump things. Just things. Any type of thing, if it's there, they'll try to hump it."

Smokescreen paused, his optics dimming for a moment. When they lit up again, he shook his helm. "That is strange."

"I think today was a very learning day for the both of us," I grinned up at him. "Yeah, humans are kind of disgusting. And not loyal. We really aren't the superior race."

"You guys didn't start a thousands years war," he pointed out.

"We don't live long enough for that," I pointed out. "In our history, I doubt we've had anything last over a couple hundred years."

"Consider yourself lucky for that, and that you're not in it right now," he told me quietly, looking back up to the sky.

I placed a hand on his leg. "Sometimes, all we can do is our best. We can't control what happens in life so you have to pick out the good parts."

He shifted. "Well, I am on Team Prime."

"Right!"

"They've really accepted me here," he nodded. "Even the humans have."

"And you were trusted enough with me," I laughed. "That's gotta mean something."

"Yeah, you're right!" he said, smiling down at me. "Fowler would have my spark if anything happened to you."

"Exactly, and he'd find a way to have everybot else's too," I said. "You're valued more than you think. So don't be so hard on yourself. And you know you can always come and talk to me about anything. After all, it's my entire life." I winked up at him.

Smokescreen ever so gently patted my head with his overly large metal hands. "Right you are."

"Now," I said, shifting to get up. I shook the sand off of my shirt. "We should probably head back before I start to get a sunburn."

"Sunburn?"

"I'll explain later."


	11. Chapter 11

Another week flew by like it was nothing. My days were filled with college coursework, adding to my dissertation, editing my thesis, and nightly drives with Smokescreen to clear my head. There would be small talk on some of the drives, but sometimes they'd be silent. I was thankful it wasn't an awkward silence from our discussion prior.

"Uncle Will is going to be back soon," I said finally. I don't know why I tried to not think about it. I was happy he was going to be back, right?

"Are you going to move back in with him?" Smokescreen's holoform asked me.

"I think so," I replied slowly, looking out my window. "I'm not really sure though. I don't think I'm ready to move all my stuff back, and besides, it would be tougher for you to be my guardian if I was off location."

"Right," he said with a nod. "In the end, though, is it up to him? Or is it up to you?"

I hadn't thought about that before. Granted, I was legally an adult, twenty years old. He didn't have to take me in in the first place. "I guess it's up to me, for the most part. I don't want to piss him off if he's wanting me to move back in with him. It's not like I had any friends back there that I left or anything. I could probably count on one hand the amount of times I left the house."

"Probably better for your mental health that you stay here?" he suggested with a small smile.

I returned the smile. "You're probably right. We'll see what he says when he gets back, though, and that should be any day now."

It hadn't crossed my mind that I could simply stay. I thought of the Autobot base in Jasper, Nevada to be a temporary home. Honestly, I considered Uncle Will's house to be a temporary home as well. I had no idea where 'home' really was anymore. I used to think home was a place, a location. For a time when I was younger, I considered home to be a person. That wasn't right as well. Home was something else. I figured home was whatever I made it to be.

Would the Autobot base be my home? There was constant talk of them returning to Cybertron to rebuild when they got the chance, so even if it was home, it wouldn't be forever. Was there such thing as a forever home? For me?

I hoped so.

~

"It's done!" I couldn't help but shout. "It's done!"

"What's done?" Miko asked me, ignoring the grumbling medic behind us.

After pressing save, I closed my laptop with the biggest grin. "My dissertation! It needs heavy editing, but now that I've got the skeleton of it done, I don't have anything else to do until fall semester!"

"Whoo-hoo!" Miko fist pumped the air. "This calls for a celebration!"

"Miko," Jack said slowly, frowning at the both of us.

She waved her hand in the air absently. "Jack, Jack, Jack. Nothing too crazy. But don't you think this deserves celebrating?"

"If Miko wants to celebrate an educational success, I'd let her," Bulkhead mumbled to Jack.

Well, he was right. Even if it wasn't her educational success.

"How much longer before you're done done?" Smokescreen asked me.

"Four semesters at most," I told him. "That's if I don't take on a full load of classes each semester, which I probably will. Not like I have a social life to keep up with."

"We shall celebrate," Miko announced. "What's your favorite food? Oh! We could do a buffet! Jack can get balloons, we could have fireworks-"

"If there are fireworks, I don't think here would be the best location to party," I said with a slight laugh. "Not if you want to keep this base a secret."

Should we wait for my uncle to be back before we celebrate? I knew he'd be proud, but I wasn't sure if he'd want to party with the Autobots, three kids, and his goddaughter. We weren't exactly a five-star bunch. Did he even like parties? I knew he was more of a mixed drink kind of guy.

These kids were too young to be drinking anyway. At least they should be.

"I could ask my mom if we could have it at my place," Jack suggested, rubbing the back of his head. "But the 'bots would have to be in holoform."

"Ratchet and I will stay behind," Optimus said, glancing down at us on the balcony. "The rest of you are welcome to... Party."

"Prime's don't party," Arcee said to me quietly. "I wouldn't take offense to it."

"Wasn't going to," I replied with a small smile. "I can't believe you guys would do all of this for me."

Miko hit me on the arm gently with a closed fist. "Hey, you're one of us now, like it or not."

Smiling up at Smokescreen, all I could think about was how much I liked it. Man, had my life taken a turn.

Suddenly, sirens began to ring from all around the base. I looked around nervously, feeling my heart rate go up.

Raf seemed to sense my angst. "That's the proximity sensor."

"Proximity sensor?" I repeated.

"Fowler must be back already," Bulkhead said with a shake of his helm.

I grinned. "He's back!"

When my uncle appeared seemingly out of nowhere, I wasted no time running to him and giving him the biggest hug. I didn't even realize how much I had missed him. He was the only person left I really considered my family. My old family.

"Hey there, squirt," he chuckled, hugging me back. I dug my face into his chest. "Calm down, I'm here. And I see you're still alive."

"Not a funny joke," I mumbled against him.

Smokescreen scoffed. "Of course she's alive. With me as her guard."

"I commend you for keeping her safe," he said. "I know she can be quite a handful."

"It was my pleasure, _sir_ ," Smokescreen replied. Was there a bite in his voice?

"Uncle Will, we were just planning a celebration- I finished my dissertation!" I said, finally releasing him from my death grip. "Well, the bulk of it, not the editing part, but still!"

He raised his hand to give me a high five. "Good for you, kiddo! A celebration, huh?" He looked towards Miko.

How did he know?

"Just a small one!" Miko quipped. "At Jack's place."

"You're more than welcome to come, Agent Fowler," Jack said quickly.

"I suppose," he said quickly, looking to me. "Have they treated you well?"

"Oh, yes," I nodded very quickly. "I've been able to get so much work done, my coursework, and I've even made some new friends."

"Don't tell me you'd rather stay here?" he asked, tilting his head.

I looked to the ground with a shrug. "Well, ya'know... You're gone a lot anyway, and they've been keeping me pretty good company."

"She's as safe as she'll ever be if she stays here," Smokescreen added with a smile.

My uncle raised a brow, looking towards him. "That so?"

"Yes, sir."

"I see no problem with it, I guess," he said slowly, placing a hand on my shoulder. "You wouldn't have to move again, not yet."

"If the 'bots are okay with it, that is," I said. I looked up at Optimus, almost thinking he'd say no. Did they like having me as much as I did?

Optimus gave me the smallest of smiles. "Of course. And Smokescreen is right, you are safe here from the Decepticon threat."

I couldn't help but grin up at Smokescreen. I wanted to hug him. He was getting so much better at hugs. "Perfect!"

~

After confirmation from Jack's mom, we decided to hold the party the following evening. June, his mom (who I had only crossed paths with a few times at base when I was out of my room) was more than happy to prepare a meal for us. Jack couldn't stop talking about how good her homemade mac and cheese was.

When Smokescreen and I arrived promptly at six in the evening, I was happy to find that they had everything set up in the backyard. There was a small fire pit with picnic tables along the side of the house. Around the fire pit, which was not yet lit, were a handful of lawn chairs. The food was already set out, and Miko (who had been in charge of balloons) had set out bunches of balloons all over, all kept from floating away by what looked like Ratchet's spare parts.

I hoped he didn't need those.

"Wow, guys, this is great!" I said, unloading the fireworks from the trunk of Smokescreen's alt mode. "A real party!"

"Well, duh, what did you expect? A lame party?" Miko mocked, her hands placed on her hips. "No way!"

It surprised me to see three other holoforms joining us. I knew they had them, but I didn't expect them to look so fitting. Bulkhead was a big guy, but not fat big. Bulky muscles big, with a round face and a short beard. Arcee was gorgeous, to put it simply. Tall, slender, and short hair. I wished I could pull off a pixie cut like that and not look like a potato. Bumblebee was nothing short of cute. His holoform had gentle features, and he didn't look much older than I did.

And they were all wearing silver party hats.

"They didn't have anything that said 'Completed My Dissertation' or whatever, but this was the next best thing," Miko said proudly, thrusting a box towards me.

I took the box and opened it. "Ah... I didn't, uh..."

I held up the sash that had once been in that box. The lettering across it read 'Basic Bitch'.

"Isn't it perfect?" Miko grinned.

I couldn't help but laugh. "Sure is," I finally said, throwing on the sash. "There's a fire pit, we better be having s'mores."

"What do we look like to you, savages?" Raf asked, holding up a bag of jumbo marshmallows.

Before I knew it, the fire pit had been lit, music was blasting all around us, and I was sitting in a lawn chair with a plate full of macaroni and cheese courtesy of June Darby. Life couldn't be better.

"You guys probably can't eat in that form, can you?" I asked through a mouthful of food, looking towards the four holoforms.

Bulkhead gave me a shrug. "We haven't tried it, but don't want to take any chances."

"And to think, I thought you were the risk taker of the group."

"Wouldn't that be him?" Arcee snickered, pointing towards the holoform of Smokescreen. Smokescreen only smiled in response. "The newbie."

I laughed. "I'm technically the newest, aren't I? Why aren't I called the newbie?"

"Tonight, you're the designated 'Basic Bitch'!" Miko burst out laughing.

"Uh, what does that mean?" Smokescreen asked, leaning towards me.

"Well, 'bitch' is a derogatory term, and basic means unoriginal," I said to him quietly. "But it's all in good fun. You know, it's Miko."

"That's not very nice," he frowned.

"Haven't you ever been called a frag head, but lovingly?"

"Uh..."

"Same thing," I laughed, taking in another mouthful. "Lighten up, frag head."

Smokescreen paused before smiling at me. "Alright, I guess."

"Nobody drink the purple punch unless you are Jack, Mrs. Darby, Whitney, or myself," Uncle Will announced.

My face lit up. "Uncle Will!"

"Not a party without your favorite drink, Whit, now is it?" he smiled at me.

Oh this was a great party indeed.

I wasted no time filling myself up with as much mac and cheese and the purple liquid as I could. I knew immediately what the purple punch was- it wasn't really punch at all. Ever since I was little, I loved mixing black cherry and blue raspberry lemonade Kool-Aid together. This was what I called 'purple drank'. My uncle had thought ahead and added my favorite blue raspberry vodka in the mix. I was truly in heaven. The worst part was that it didn't even taste like alcohol.

I noticed Miko getting a cup of it from Bulkhead, even though we all knew he wasn't going to drink it. I decided not to say anything. Hey, I was fourteen once. Live a little.

Soon enough, all of the macaroni had been eaten, all of the marshmallows had been toasted and s'mores'd, and we were lighting off fireworks. My uncle had decided to leave that part to him, as the oldest and most experienced of us.

To be fair, the Autobots were probably much older than him, but he was right in saying he had the most experience lighting off fireworks. I doubted they knew anything about explosives that weren't meant for destruction.

"What is- wow!" Smokescreen said quietly, looking up to the sky. "That's awesome!"

"Ever seen something like that?" I asked him, grabbing his hand. "Come on, we can see better up top."

"Up top?"

"Come on!"

My past experience in physical training served me well as I helped Smokescreen scale the wall up to the roof of the Darby house. It was not as easy as I had hoped, but we didn't break any windows. I was lucky nobody was watching, my coordination was not the best in my inebriated state. I lost the sash.

"See? Better from up here," I told him, pulling him to lay down next to me. "You can see it all from up here."

"Yeah- oh, look at that one!"

I never imagined an Autobot would be so amazed by multi-colored fireworks. Explosions that were not meant to kill. I only imagined it would be comforting.

Suddenly he grabbed my face. My immediate thought was that he was going to point me in the direction of another explosion. To my surprise, I found him placing his lips on mine.

For a reason I couldn't fathom, I didn't pull away.


	12. Chapter 12

I hadn't had many first kisses in my twenty years. Less than five or six, probably. It was sad to think I usually was the one to initiate them out of fear they would never take it upon themselves to do so.

This first kiss was most unexpected, but it was unexpectedly welcome? I guess?

Never in a million years did I imagine I'd share a kiss with a being that wasn't of Earth. I don't think many people think that way. I wondered why he did it, but I let that thought go as quickly as I could. It wasn't hard, seeing as I was drunky drunk.

"Weren't the fireworks so pretty?" I said softly, gazing out the window on the drive back to the Autobot base. "The colors, they even sounded pretty."

"They were nice," Smokescreen mused through the radio. He didn't say much after that. I thought about that, too, but again dropped that thought pretty quickly.

"Ya know, why would they name themselves the 'Decepticons' if they think they're the good guys? Really, they need to pick another name," I slurred out, pressing my cheek against the glass. "Or maybe they know they're bad. And they _like_ _it_. What a bunch of weirdos."

"You need sleep, Whitney," Smokescreen chuckled. "Big time."

"Sleep, schmeep," I said, waving my arm in the air. "Why sleep when you can do other things?"

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Literally anything but sleep," I concluded with a yawn. "Sleep is for losers."

I didn't remember even making it back to base.

~

As it turned out, I was indeed a loser. A loser with a killer hangover.

"I don't know how other kids my age handle this shit," I whined as I stumbled up to the balcony of the base, my biggest and fluffiest blanket wrapped around me. "One hell of a party, though, guys. Thanks."

"You want some medicine?" Jack asked, holding up a small pill bottle. "Tylenol. My mom thought you might want some."

I gulped down the pills like they were candy, no water to wash them down either. I couldn't wait for them to kick in. "Why's it so quiet?" I said, looking around. The only 'bot in my view was Ratchet.

"It was until you came along," he called from his position in front of the monitors.

I couldn't help but grin as I plopped down on the floor. "Please. I can't be louder than Miko."

It wasn't until I said that that I realized that Miko was laying sideways on the couch, her legs draped over Jack's thighs. She clearly had it worse than I did.

I laughed quietly. "It was that good, huh?"

"Don't even look at me," she said dramatically, placing her arm over her eyes. "I'm suffering."

"You and me both. Where are the others?"

"Optimus sent them out on separate missions, I think," Raf told me. He typed furiously on his laptop. "Several Energon deposits popped up on the radar, they split up. They even called Wheeljack for help."

Wheeljack? Had I met that one yet? "That's a big mission I guess. Or missions."

"Why, do you miss Smokescreen yet?" Miko prodded quietly, I could see her smile under her arm.

"Miss Smokescreen? Why would I-" I stopped.

Wait a minute.

Wait a fucking minute.

Did Smokescreen and I-

_Oh fuck._

I felt my cheeks get hot. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"What exactly occurred at this party?" Ratchet asked slowly, turning around to face us.

I shot Miko a look that could kill and shook my head. "Nothing happened! Nothing happened between me and Smokescreen. I just got drunk and climbed on the roof is all."

"Is that how normal human parties end? On a rooftop?" Ratchet questioned.

I swore at that moment his optics were lasers into my soul. "The ones I'm at, at least."

"With Smokescreen," Miko coughed.

I only remembered kissing him briefly. Did more happen that I just didn't remember?

Thank God Raf changed the subject. I could have hugged him. "How's the groundbridge recallibration coming along, Ratchet?" he asked, dangling his feet over the balcony. He only looked up from his laptop screen for a split second.

It didn't interest me to listen in on their conversation for much longer. My head was aching, swimming in thoughts of what had happened the night before. It was just a kiss, right? Just a kiss. It wasn't a big deal.

Oh God. Did my uncle see that? He would not be pleased.

Did I initiate it? What did I even do when it happened? I didn't know if Smokescreen would tell me even if I asked him. Was he thinking about this like I was?

What even were his intentions?

None of my education in psychology and the human brain, the general intentions, prepared me for this shit.

Under normal circumstances I would delve myself into my schoolwork. It hurt my soul not to have that crutch in these moments. Without peer review over my dissertation and my thesis, I couldn't do anything. The draft was done! I just...

I needed a better distraction.

Before I could gather my thoughts around a better distraction than my schooling, I heard an engine rolling through the driveway through the base. I wasn't lucky enough for it to be one of the three kids' bots.

No, it was mine.

_Mine? Was I calling him mine now?_

"Hey, Smokes!" Miko called down to him from the balcony once he had transformed. "Any luck?"

"Nada," he replied with a shake of his helm. "Cleaned out dry by the time I got there." I felt his optics on me, but I refused to look up. It would be admitting defeat.

I couldn't help myself.

"As opposed to cleaned out wet?" I mumbled under my breath. "Or damp? Moist?"

"What kind of dumb joke is that?" Miko snickered.

After finally looking up, I saw that I was right. He was looking at me. I just couldn't read his expression.

"I don't suppose you're up for a drive, Whit?" Smokescreen asked me. "Whitney, I mean. You look like you could use a drive."

"She's being a spoil sport after last night," Miko said in a sing-song tone of voice. "Hangovers don't look so good on her. You'd think she'd be used to them by now-"

"I'm not a party girl," I interjected, waving my hand. "I don't really drink. Often. I mean, yeah I have a drink now and then, but I don't usually drink like last night. I could hardly taste the alcohol so I went a bit overboard. That so bad?"

"She needs a drive," Jack concluded from beside me. "A long one at that."

"Aren't I the adult here?" I scoffed. "Besides Ratchet. Shouldn't I be making my own decisions?"

"Is that a no, then?" Smokescreen questioned.

"I'll go," I said without thinking. Damn it. "Come on, get this over with."


	13. Chapter 13

Curses to myself for not being able to say no to a drive. If anything was my weakness (besides alcoholic purple drank), it would be going for a drive.

"So... Your energon deposit mission didn't yield any results?" I said slowly, leaning my cheek against the cool glass window of the passenger side. "Bummer."

"Yeah, nothing," he said through the radio speakers. "I think Arcee and Bulkhead found something on their jaunt. I could be called back to help."

I frowned. "If you think you're going to get called back, why ask to go on a drive?"

"I figured you might want to talk about something."

I froze, humming myself through an awkward pause. "Right. You kissed me last night." This was one way to go about it. Communication was good.

"I didn't- Whitney, I'm sorry if it was a bad move on my part." His holoform sizzled into place, placing a hand on my knee. "Honest. I don't know what got into me. It just sort of... Happened. After our talk about what humans do and what we do in forms of affection, I was curious."

"You didn't think to see what it felt like to kiss Arcee?" I snorted quietly. "I'm no lesbian, but have you seen her holoform? The perfect mix of sexy and dangerous." I looked up to him.

He smiled. "I thought the real thing might be better. I know I probably crossed a line-"

"You know, humans don't just go around kissing people. I don't, at least. We do things like that when we have a connection with someone, we care deeply for someone." Okay, so one night stands do happen for sure. But I figured that wouldn't aid in my explanation at the moment. "I think I'd be more hurt if you saw kissing me as more of an experiment than you actually feeling something for me."

"Who said I didn't feel something for you?" It was his turn to frown. He pulled his hand away from me, looking towards the road.

I sighed. "I just mean... Agh, why do things have to be so complicated?"

Smokescreen shook his head. "They're only as complicated as you make them be."

"Would you stop using my words against me?" I fought back a smile. He was all too good at listening, though I would bet Ratchet would disagree. "It doesn't sound right coming out of you. You're not so proper."

"And yet you kissed me back," he replied, tapping his thumbs against the steering wheel. "That must mean something. What say you, doc?"

I could get used to that form of seniority. One day. "I was intoxicated. Though... I'm not sure I'd make a different decision sober."

"And why do you think that is?"

Curses for him using my own questioning psychology. "I can't lie. You could probably make a living as a model if you were actually human in that holoform." I cleared my throat- damn, I sounded shallow as hell. "But we get along well, you're a good person at heart-spark, I mean."

"Do you like me?" He sounded more childish than usual with that sentence.

I had half a mind to clap my hand on his knee, but didn't. I tried to contain myself. "I'm attracted to your personality, if that's what you mean. Sure. Yes, I like you. Okay? Is that what you want to hear?"

After a long minute of silence, I continued. "Where do you suggest we go from here?"

This did not sound like your typical 'oh! I like you, and you like me too!' conversation. Far from it. This would complicate things so tremendously, with him being my guardian and all. Was this even allowed? Oh, God. What would Optimus say? What would my uncle say?

You know, I was just glad I wasn't pregnant with an alien baby. We didn't sleep together.

Right? I'm pretty sure.

"I've never been in the process of courting a femme," Smokescreen chuckled quietly, pulling off to the side of the road. "Much less a human femme. I know it may seem... What's that word?"

"Unorthodox?" I suggested.

"Yes, that word," he nodded. "But I'd like to think this might be worth a try."

My heart rate began to rise. "You think so? What about the others?"

"They'll always have their opinions," he said absently, waving his hand in the air before smiling at me. "Our races aren't so different, and especially since I have this form, how complicated can things really be?"

I considered that. Honestly, it wasn't like we were getting married that day or anything. We would just see how things went, what happened then. Nothing was set in stone. His human form did help a lot. I tried to consider if I'd feel the same way about him if he didn't have that.

His alt mode was gorgeous, his personality was the same. It was just easier to have the holoform to relate to physically. Sex would-

_Whitney, calm down. Not right now._

"Courting wouldn't be such a bad idea," I said slowly, turning back to him to find our lips touching.

You know what, this would be alright. Just fine. I could live with this.

~

Smokescreen and I decided to keep our 'courtship' on the down-low for the time being. It was new to both of us. Well, new to him more than me. I had dated many a time before him. I wondered if that would help me in the long run.

As soon as we returned to base not long after our conversation, he was called to Arcee and Bulkhead's location to help with some energon situation. Miko tried to sneak out with him, but I managed to hold her back long enough for him to go through the bridge alone. She was stronger than I thought.

"So, how'd it go with Smokey? You guys talk?" Miko asked as soon as I got her settled back on the couch.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, we talked. He wanted to see what it was like to kiss a human. A few days ago, we talked about the differences between human relationships and affection opposed to theirs. He was curious."

"So it was a one time thing?" she prodded.

Again, I nodded. "One time thing, girly. He's my guardian. I bet he could get in trouble if anything else happened."

"That would be super complicated," Miko considered. "But so cool! Dating an alien? That's something from a science fiction movie!"

I tilted my head at her. "You do realize we're basically living in a science fiction movie, right? Alien robots, robot war, the whole deal?" It was weird to think of our lives like that, but it was true. We were. There were science nerds around the world that would kill for the life we were living. It was surreal. 

Miko shrugged. "Well, yeah, but just adding on an interracial relationship?"

I squinted at her. "Interesting. I'm not sure all humans are comfortable with inter-cultural relationships just yet. And you think they're ready for a relationship between a human and an alien?"

Talk about really being interracial though. Different races entirely. That was something else. And I'd be the first human to date an Autobot, a Cybertronian. How about that.

"Ratchet? Do you think you could bridge me somewhere? I kind of want to go for a run," I said, getting up from my seat. If I said anything more to Miko, she'd definitely get suspicious. I was a good liar, but I didn't want to chance it.

"Are you certain that's a good idea?" Ratchet questioned me.

I smiled. "Uncle Will gave me a panic button. I should be fine."

~

Before long, I was jogging along some trail in the center of the United States. It was crazy to think how fast these guys could travel such long distances. I had thought about having him bridge me somewhere exciting, like Greece, but I figured it would be safer to be in my home country. I was close to home. I felt it in the air.

My earbuds blasted some old country songs as I breathed in the clean countryside air. My feet hit the ground with each drum beat, a smile on my face.

The smile vanished as something with large hands grabbed me, so quick I couldn't reach for my panic button around my neck.


	14. Chapter 14

I had heard so much about these Decepticons from the Autobots and the three kids, but in all of their stories, I never considered how much larger they were compared to the Autobots I knew and loved. Like, _Jesus_. These guys were _titans_ compared to the 'bots.

For some reason unbeknownst to me, I didn't feel the fear I figured I would in this situation. I steadied my breaths, only closing my eyes for a fraction of a second each time to blink. I was worth more to them alive than dead. I kept telling myself that. It would be stupid for them to kill me.

How did they even know who I was? Or where?

"Ah, the secret Autobot pet," a voice crooned through the dark. I could only see his glowing red eyes. The Decepticon stepped into the light, grinning at me. "We finally meet."

"You could have made an appointment, you know," I retorted, studying him. His posture told me he was feigning confidence, but he was trying.

"Are you comfortable?"

A trick question, I knew. I was bound by chains, held up in the air by my limbs. The metal around my wrists began to rub and cut against my skin. No, I was most certainly not comfortable. "It's no Hilton Hotel here. I do have to ask, is there a continental breakfast in the morning?"

A sharp talon quickly found itself at my neck. The Decepticon laughed. "You are a feisty one. Whitney Turner, is it?"

"Who's asking?" I groaned, his talon piercing my skin just enough to hurt my vocal chords.

"Starscream," he scowled, retreating his talon. He took a step back and began to pace back and forth, tapping against his chin. "What a coincidence we managed to find you unguarded in the middle of nowhere."

"Your tracking skills must be just that good," I hummed, choosing not to meet his optics with my stare. "What do you want from me?"

Starscream laughed again, a terrifying sound. It was a good thing I had gone to the bathroom before my run. I might've peed myself. Okay, maybe I was a little bit scared. "I believe you know. The location of the Autobot base, and I might let you live."

"Like, coordinates?" I frowned. "I'm not so familiar with those. I'm a woman, you know, not the best with my cardinal directions-"

"Silence!" he yelled. "You know where they are! Perhaps you need a little bit of motivation... Knockout! The prod, if you will."

Oh shit.

~

Sweat beaded down my forehead. It was harder for me to steady my breaths, no matter how much I tried. Something you never think about is how it feels to be electrocuted. At least, I never thought of how it would feel.

Well, buddy, let me fucking tell you. Shit hurts. They weren't going easy on me.

Starscream had left before Knockout began with my 'punishment', and Knockout finally gave me a break after what felt like hours. Time didn't seem to be a thing in there. He soon left as well, and I was all alone, hanging like an ornament against the wall of a large dimly lit room.

Hanging in the air with nothing to do really makes you think, I soon realized. There wasn't anything else to do but think. Did anybody notice I was gone by then? I had no idea if I still had my phone in my pocket, but I doubted I had it after the struggle. My panic button was gone as well. I was lucky to still have clothes on, not that it would make a big difference other than to me. The Decepticons didn't strike me as beings interested in human anatomy like some Autobots I knew.

Oh, right. Smokescreen. Surely he realized my absence. How long had it been by now? At least a few hours, that much I was sure of. Damn me for not believing in wearing a watch.

I blinked rapidly as a bead of sweat made its way into my eye. There was no way I could move my arms even a little bit from where they were positioned, I had no way to wipe it away. Oh it stung, but it was nothing compared to the electrocution I endured. I could take it.

What I didn't know was how long my body could handle this. How long were they going to keep it up? I needed a plan. An escape plan.

~

I had managed to take a little nap before being abruptly awoken by a strange faceless Decepticon. I swore my heart was going to explode.

"Oh shit!" I whispered to myself, shaking my head. "You scared me!"

The faceless Decepticon didn't say anything. He lifted his palm up towards me, and my body tensed, ready to be hit and put out of my misery.

Instead, in his palm revealed a wrapped... Something. Food?

Food!

Why was he feeding me? Was this my continental breakfast?

All I knew was that I wasn't going to complain. Maybe I'd survive.

~

"Starscream! Long time no see!" I called out with fake joy as I saw my captor enter my hellish room.

"Human," he mumbled. "Have you seen reason?"

"Seen reason? You mean, am I going to give in?" I asked, thinking quickly.

"Indeed, will you disclose the location of the Autobot base?" he replied, smirking at me. "I'm not certain how much longer you will last otherwise, if you want to keep your life."

I shook my head. "No, you're right. But before I help you, I have a question to ask you."

The lowly Decepticon perked up. "Yes?"

"Why hasn't Megatron come to see me?" I asked with a frown. "He's supposed to be your leader. Does he even know I'm here?"

"That is none of your business, human-!"

"I'm just saying," I continued. "You've probably kept me a secret for a reason. You want the upper hand. You want to be the leader here, don't you?"

I didn't wait for him to answer.

"You'd probably make a great leader, actually," I continued. "Your dedication, your... Your skill. I doubt that Megatron has done nearly as much for the Decepticons as you have."

Starscream seemed to eye me carefully. "You are very observant, smart. What of it, human?"

"Who all knows I'm here?"

"I do. Knockout as well, nobody else is allowed in these quarters."

Ah. He didn't mention the faceless Decepticon. Interesting.

I took a deep breath. "Well, it would look very good on your record if it came out that you discovered the Autobot base all by yourself and took it down. Don't you think?"

"That is the plan, human! Will you give me the location or not?" He sounded like he was about to attack me if I didn't hurry it up.

"I'll give you the location of the base on one condition, Starscream," I said finally.

"Oh? What is your condition?"

"Don't send me back there. I don't want to be there when it all goes down," I said quietly, sniffling. "I want to be far away when it happens. I don't care where."

Starscream grinned at me. "It seems we have a deal, human."

~

In a matter of minutes, I was bridged from the Decepticon ship to some unknown location. I wasn't even sure I was still in the United States. All I knew is that I was surrounded by fields of something I couldn't name, and there was nothing in the horizon. I had a lot of walking to do.

As much as my body hated me in that moment, I forced myself to keep going along that road. It seemed like time both flew by and it stopped all at the same time. I had checked my pockets for my phone, it was gone. The panic button necklace was gone as well. I wasn't sure if they were lost when I was captured or when I was on the ship. I had nothing, walking along some road in a place I did not know.

It felt like hours before I reached a gas station. I was relieved to find everything was in English. It gave me hope that maybe I was still in my home country at least. After twenty minutes of asking, I finally found somebody to give me some quarters for the payphone. I dialed the only number I could remember by heart, hoping it worked on regular phones as well.

"Smokescreen? Smokescreen, it's Whitney. I-"

" _Whitney?_ Where are you?"

"I don't know, I just want to go home," I said quietly into the speaker, trying to hold back my tears. "I don't know where I am."

"Hold on, Whitney, Ratchet is tracing the signal. We're on our way, okay? Do you need anything?"

"A hug?" I couldn't think of anything I wanted, I needed, more.

"We're coming, it's going to be alright."


	15. Chapter 15

It was such a blur as three Autobot vehicles surrounded me outside of the gas station. I knew there were three, but the only one I could even attempt to focus on was Smokescreen. My heart hurt when I was rushed into another vehicle, who I afterwards realized was Ratchet, and was sped away.

“Whitney, do you remember what happened?” the sharp voice of Ratchet surrounded me.

I started to shake my head before yelping in pain. “I-uh… I just want to go home.”

“We’re taking you back to the base, Whitney, you’re safe now,” the voice assured me.

I never wanted to go on another run again.

~

They seemed so small compared to the giant beings that had earlier surrounded me. It would have been comforting if not for them passing me around like a rag doll. It seemed that way at least.

“Whitney, are you alright?”

“Where do you feel pain?”

“Do you know how long you were gone?”

“ _Whitney!_ I-”

It took everything I had in me to keep from screaming. The voices I once knew surrounded me in what felt like a nightmare. They echoed in my head. It wouldn’t stop.

I looked around the room slowly, trying to drown out the voices. Everybody was there, even my Uncle. Even Nurse Darby. The kids.

“Give her some space, guys,” I heard Smokescreen say from across the room. My eyes darted to find him. He leaned against the wall, shaking his helm, his optics dimmed.

As the voices slowly began to stop, I heard Nurse Darby more clearly. “Whitney, hon, I need you to tell me where it hurts.”

“My head,” I croaked. I didn’t even realize my throat was so scratchy. It hurt to talk. “When I breath in, I feel this- this pressure.” I continued to explain to her my every injury, every little thing that gave me pain in my body that I knew wasn’t normal.

My shirt was torn in the middle, though it was more burnt through than torn. I didn’t even want to think about what I looked like as a whole. Or smelled like. I hoped nobody cared.

Nurse Darby shook her head. “I’m going to take you to your room to do a full examination, okay? Whitney, can you walk?”

I had managed to walk however long it took me to get to that gas station in the middle of bum fuck nowhere. I could physically do it, but mentally I wasn’t sure I could handle it.

I managed to shake my head slowly, deciding I didn’t even want to try.

Ratchet helped Nurse Darby slowly lower the gurney (cot? I couldn't tell the difference) I was on to the ground level. It was a smoother transition than I could have even hoped for.

Once we were in my room, Nurse Darby shut my door. It was just us.

“Whitney, I need to do a full body examination, okay?” she said to me gently. “I need to know what we’re working with here.”

It was hard for me to tell if there was more of a mess happening with me physically or mentally.

“Okay,” I replied quietly. She was a medical professional, I had to trust her.

June slowly lifted my shirt above my head, exposing my abdomen and every bit of myself I already hated. I didn’t dare look down. June tried to hide her expression, but failed miserably. It told me everything I needed to know.

“What about your arms? Your legs?” she asked as she began cleaning my abdomen with a stingy cloth.

“All superficial, I think,” I told her. “Except I think my ribs. I’m not sure.” This was not my area of expertise. I dealt with the mind, the brain. I only knew the bare necessities of the body.

She clicked her tongue. “I’m not sure if this is a chemical burn or thermal.”

I winced. The prod. “I couldn’t tell. I just know it hurt.”

“They tortured you?” She looked up at me, into my eyes.

“It was this prod.” I felt my eyes begin to sting. “I don’t know what it was exactly. They… They were merciless.”

I remembered the faceless Decepticon. _He brought me food._

“Do you know how long you were gone, Whitney?” June asked me after a pregnant silence.

“I don’t know. A few days?”

“ _Eleven_ ,” she replied, shaking her head. “You’re going to be okay. Physically, at least. I’m no doctor, but the only thing I’m concerned about is your ribs. Without an x-ray I can’t confirm if it’s a fracture or a break, but you don’t need surgery.”

_ Eleven days? I was gone for that long? _

As she continued to explain the extent of my injuries, I found myself zoning out.

“I’m guessing taking me to a regular hospital would raise suspicion?” I sighed. “Thank God I’m alive.”

“I’m not going to make you stay on this cot, but try not to jostle yourself too much. I’m going to give Ratchet these samples from your abdomen to make sure it doesn’t contain Energon. For now, I want you to make yourself comfortable and rest,” she told me. “Drink lots of fluids, try to eat something. Rest.”

Before I could process what she said, I was already alone in my room. I blinked, looking around. I felt like I was an alien in my own home. Everything was the same as it was before, but somehow I was out of place.

I struggled out of the cot, somehow managing not to fall flat on the floor in the process. I trudged to my bed, not bothering to pull up the covers as my head slowly but all too quickly hit the pillow.

~

I jerked awake, feeling sweat beading down my forehead.

“Whitney, are you alright?”

The voice of Smokescreen instantly both calmed me and made my heart skip a beat.

“Smokes?”

“You were crying out, sweetspark,” he told me gently. It took me a moment to realize he was in his holoform. “Bad dream?”

“I don’t remember,” I said, and I was sure I didn’t want to remember. “What time is it?”

“Early,” he told me quietly, stroking my hair. “Too early for you to be awake.”

It was dark, and yet I could still see the brightness of his eyes. Even in his holoform, his eyes glowed like nothing else. “Can you stay with me?” I said without thinking.

Without a reply, Smokescreen slowly scooted closer to me and laid down on my bed, pulling me closer to him ever so gently.

I rested my cheek against his chest, closing my eyes again.

_ Maybe everything would be okay. _


End file.
